Learning from our Moms
Reflections, signs of healthy and unhealthy love, and a Free Virtual Workshop!
First and foremost, apology my dear readers and learners.
I could not send out this issue yesterday, because of travel and stomach flu. But I showed up today. (So much of our life is just that- Showing Up!)
So please treat this issue with same kindness and love. 🧡
Let’s jump right to it.
Welcome new subscribers, I am so excited to have you here.
You can explore some of our previous issues here.
For our top 3 issues of all time, check these one out:
In this newsletter, you are going to find:
My reflections on learning from our mothers
Learning to Love
And some more information on our **Free Virtual Workshop**
A way to connect with me!
Learning from our Mothers
A mother is usually the first teacher we get. From the first touch and the first drop of milk, we learn love and survival. Our mothers usually teach us how to eat, to walk, to laugh, our first words and to sit with our heads lifted up- in all its sense. There is so much that a mother teaches us.
As we start finding our own identities, we look to our parents and in my case, especially my mom and imbibe sometimes their good and sometimes not-so-good qualities. Some of the things my mother taught me are:
Her love for cleanliness and organisation
Taking strength from faith
How to be forgiving and letting things go, especially when it comes to family & friends
But then there are other things too, our parents-and many a times our Moms, knowingly or unknowingly teach us - their biases, their view of life, their unhealed trauma that affects our behaviour and worldview.
My mother-like most of us-holds a lot of biases against people, ideas, and views. And as a sponge in her care, I could have absorbed all of them, and maybe I did. But experiences that were different from her, opportunities that perhaps she did not get and just by the virtue of being born in a more connected global world, I was able to un-learn many of these.
My mom is my best friend and my first teacher.
For everything that she taught me, I am grateful.
And I am still discovering everything I am yet to un-learn.
A fleeting thought- I am sure, a parent also learns everyday. The relationship of a parent and a child is not that different from a teacher and a student. A teacher is tasked to guide and support the student in their growth and so is a parent. A teacher learns as much, if not more, from a student, as does a parent from a child. In the end, it’s all the same - to be able to evolve, one has to learn and un-learn.
Learning to Love
I am a firm believer that there should be a school for relationships and love. So much of the hurt, pain and burden we carry has its roots in our relationships.
While writing this issue, and thinking about my own relationship with my mom, I was reminded of this TED Talk by Katie Hood on healthy and unhealthy love.
This talk focuses on romantic relationships, but there is a lot we can learn from this for all our relationships- relationship with our parents, our friends, even colleagues.
Watch it here:
Here are my key takeaways:
We all need to be schooled in ways to love.
All of us are on the receiving end of unhealthy love behaviour and all of us will exhibit unhealthy love behaviour.
5 Markers of Unhealthy love:
Intensity, Isolation, Extreme Jealousy, Belittling, VolatilityElements of healthy relationships:
Open Communication, Mutual Respect, Kindness and Patience
Some words to think more deeply on
It’s not how a relationship starts that matters, but it’s how it evolves.
Your partners words should build you up and not break you down.
While love is an instinct and an emotion, the ability to love better is a skill that we can all build on and improve over time.
If you are looking to love better, check out the OneLove’s Resource Section:
Love is Learned: https://www.joinonelove.org/love-is-learned/
The FREE Virtual Workshop
In the last newsletter I shared, I am doing a free virtual workshop.
If you want to exercise your creative muscles, build confidence and want to have 90 minutes of fun, sign up for my Make a Zine with Me! workshop here.
Want to know more about the workshop, go here.
Connect with Me
If you are a Learning Designer and want to have a chat about Anything and Everything about Learning, book a slot here.
I do not promise to have all the answers, but I do promise to listen.
Thank you for reading The Learning Pill.
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Keep Learning!
Adios,
Avni